I'm an Idiot
As I mentioned earlier, I recently had to start using a diaphragm because a medication that I'm taking interferes with horemonal birth control. What I didn't mention is that I continued to take the pill at the advice of the nurse practitioner who fitted me for the diaphragm. I gathered that this had something to do with the fact that diaphragms are only 80%-90% effective, and that it isn't a great idea to get pregnant while taking medication. This didn't strike me as an entirely satisfactory explanation, since the drug is class B, which means that I could stop taking it at the first sign of pregnancy with a very low chance of ill effects. I rarely argue with medical experts, however, so I took my two prescriptions -- one for a diaphragm, and one for birth control pills -- and left.
I filled the diaphragm prescription right away, but I still had a pack of birth control pills plus a few extras, so I set the pill prescription aside. I decided to give myself some time to decide whether to keep taking the pill, and maybe get a second opinion from my GP. So I put off filling the prescription until the last minute, and then I couldn't find it, and then I ran out of pills and it was Friday afternoon and I decided, to hell with it, I had a diaphragm anyway.
That was my first act of idiocy. My second was ignoring Avigayil's advice and looking at the diaphragm when I took it out yesterday morning. There was blood on it -- real blood this time. I emailed the new rabbi (more on her later) and quickly filled my prescription, but it was to late. I am still bleeding, so in accordance with her instructions I will have to consider myself niddah, barely a week after my last mikvah visit.
I couldn't bear to tell my husband that these seven extra days of celibacy are my fault for going off the pill in the middle of the month, so I told him that the spotting was probably the result of the new meds interfering with the pill. Now I feel doubly crappy -- I never lie to my husband. Maybe I'll tell him the truth when he comes home. Or maybe he'll read this post. Either way, it won't make the situation any better.